I've seen both the musicals, Shrek the Musical and Hair. They both address issues of feeling different. One of the songs in Shrek, Freak Flag, really got me thinking. It reminded me of the 60s when the term "freak flag" first came into use.
It is my experience that each of us feels in some way different than the rest
of our family, group of friends, work colleagues, neighbors, or other people in the world. A lot of us feel like we have to hide that difference. Whether it be shame or just wanting to fit in, we keep that special part of us hidden.
Your specialness may be your political view, your spiritual beliefs, your past, what you consider your weakness, or maybe it is your insecurity. Unfortunately, if we keep part of us under wraps, others don't have the opportunity to really get to know us. Not being known prevents us from having truly intimate relationships. Think what a relief it would be to not feel it necessary to hide.
Here are some strategies if you are ready to risk letting yourself be known:
- Take baby steps - Write down your "secret" on a small slip of paper and tuck it into your wallet or pocket. Walk around for a few days knowing that it is close to coming out.
- Tell your truth - Choose a trusted friend or relative and ask if they would be willing to listen to you tell your truth out loud. Discuss their reaction. Take some time to practice with that friend getting used to speaking out loud. You may want to do this step with several people.
- Put it out there - Don't feel like you have to make an announcement. Choose a safe situation. Wait until a topic comes up in conversation or a struggle comes up in a relationship that has to do with your truth, then take a deep breath and tell it.
Self care can be about liberation. Think of letting your specialness be known. Fly your Freak Flag proudly!
